Existing in a Unstable World: Feel Now, Not Later
The past couple of weeks, there’s been repeated violence against marginalized bodies, and we, the communities, are the ones to pick up the pieces.
We’ve witnessed these unjust actions against our families, our friends, and our neighbors. We are expected to turn the cheek because we're told “you’re lucky it wasn’t you” or “things are not so bad”. In reality, when one of us is hurt, it hurts us all.
We hold these realities of experiencing and witnessing these traumas collectively, while needing to go about our days in an unforgiving capitalist society, which has normalized the “work now, feel later” mentality. Rent is due. We have to go to work. We have children to take care of. We need to go to class. There is always ‘something else’ to attend to, otherwise we risk our livelihood.
It is important that the “later” comes, for our bodies become a holding space for all the pain and collective trauma we’re experiencing. The body becomes riddled with fear, sadness, and anger. But these feelings aren’t the issue. Systems of oppression may make it seem like they are, however, these feelings are an important starting point; they let us know how we can confront these unjust actions. These systems benefit from our silence, so when we feel and when we connect, that is a form of resistance.
Emotions can be isolating. When we’re experiencing fear, there may be a desire to want to pull away from society at large, making it hard to trust those around us. And in this political climate, that is completely valid. Fear makes sense when you witness people being ripped from the arms of their loved ones. Fear makes sense when there’s hourly news updates about something heinous occurring in your neighborhood. It is okay not to feel safe, but it is important to remember that there are spaces that are safe for us. Communities can be that and communities are created when we lean toward our loved ones.
When we’re experiencing sadness, sometimes we don’t even have the energy to engage with what is happening. Sometimes we may even berate ourselves for not “doing more.” We lay in bed, not sure why we should even get up. What is the point if the state of the country is in chaos? Sadness makes sense when there’s been generations of inflicted pain. Sadness makes sense when it feels like there is no hope in the current situation. This is a chance to find something within our control, to gain the sense of agency back. Think about what is within your control and within your influence. It is okay to focus on yourself first to take care of your needs and then extend a helping hand to others in your community. Maybe in this moment, you have the capacity to shower, and nothing else, that is okay.
Sometimes you might feel so angry and you just want to let it all out. You can even feel the emotion vibrating in your body and clenching in your fists. When you see your loved ones in pain, it may seem that your frustration is consuming you. But anger can be a beautiful emotion—it can motivate us to take action, and right now, we’re witnessing how collective anger is being used. It can help unify us to take a stand, we just have to point our anger in the right direction.
Expressing emotions and taking action can always look different for anyone—it can be you going to a protest or self-reflecting and acknowledging your privilege or biases. This can also look like talking to those who can provide a safe space for you and hear you out. In doing this, it is important to take the time to practice self-care. It can be great to take action, get involved, but not at the expense of suppressing your emotions. However you decide to move forward, It’s important to create a space for both to exist.
